Tuesday, October 7, 2008

life's important questions

let me start off by stating that i don't intend to be ignorant or uncaring. these questions come from a place of genuine wonder and awe for the world around me.
if someone has a lazy eye, which eye do you look at? in a training session today one of the attendees seated opposite had a lazy left eye that was constantly pointed in my direction, regardless of any head movement. it was like a one eyed mona-lisa staring me down which begged the question - should i act as if she is watching me even when the good eye is pointing away? is she actively focusing on me or is it akin to peripheral vision?
so i turn to ask jeeves, only to find out he's going by the name of ask these days (someone got a little full of himself)

question: should i act like the lazy eye can see me?
result: the lazy eye syndrome. anyone know how to cure it?

we'd all like a cure jeeves, but that doesnt help me here and now. dont answer a question with a question, this is not ask confucius


if i accidentally hit myself in the cobblers at work and other people are in the room, is it ok to acknowledge the severe pain im going through if there are females present? sure its fine when other men are in the room, but is it appropriate to share when the fairer sex is wondering why I look like im about to pass out and refusing to talk?
question: is it ok to tell women i hit myself in the nuts?
result: is it ok to occasionally hit your girlfriend?

again not kosher to answer a question with a question, but more disturbing is that jeeves thinks its ok to take your pain out on loved ones. not cool jeeves, not cool



/fin

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hey, am I the first person to comment on your site? If so, uh, well okay then. Please turn of your word verification and name/site comments!

I was going to say that, if the eye is constantly on you, regardless of head movement, then it couldn't have been the lazy eye. It must have been the good one. The one that she looks at stuff with. Ergo she was staring at you. Passionately, no doubt. Such is my (admittedly purely speculative) understanding of the condition.

Unknown said...

*off *allow name/site comments.

Ugh. The point with taking off the word verification is that it cuts typing for RSI folks like me, and people seem ok without it.

pareto said...

tops feedback mark, its now fixed and although i now live in fear that unscrupulous viagra companies and their bots may use this site for evil, i can look forward to a depth-perception challenged relationship with my new admirer!